They say to me, "I could not face what you've been through."
They seem to think that I am strong, that my courage has won the day.
Dear Lord, help me to admit to them that what they see is not my doing.
Embolden my heart to open to them the secret places of my weakness.
My battle with Fear was heated; I nearly fainted and lost all,
And I would have if the Weapon of Your Word had not been my stay.
When I thought that Fear would surely conquer all, You gave me the gift of Faith.
Even then, when alone with my knowledge of what I must face,
My rebel heart, in anguished tears, repeated impassioned cries of "Why?"
They did not see me then, my red exhausted eyes and pallid skin;
They did not hear my hoarsened voice still whispering, "Why me?
"What have I sown to reap this course of painful, ravaging disease?"
They cannot know how often the enemy of my soul taunted me,
How often my own rebellious flesh provoked dire moods of doubt.
Dear Lord, Your Word, Your Mercy were my stay in those dark times.
Before I could fall, You lifted me gently, dried my rebel tears,
And soothed me next Your Heart.
You gave me unfathomable Peace that calmed my wounded spirit
As the sun comforts and composes nature after a storm siege.
So, when they praise me for my courage,
When they mark the glow reflected in my eyes,
When they hear laughter in my voice
And see the smile that lights my face,
When they read the words that You have helped my hand to write,
Enable me to make known the truth that they do not see my strength;
They see Your Grace!